How to Turn Your Problems into Strength

Do you feel like your life has ups and downs? Paul certainly did. In Dan Orange's talk at Crowd Church, he unpacks what we can learn from Paul's extended period of waiting—stuck under arrest, unable to do much, yet somehow not wasting the time. And his insights might just change how you view your own waiting seasons.

This isn't a talk about trying harder or praying more. It's about understanding that sometimes God uses the hard times, the frustrating times, the seasons where nothing seems to be happening, to teach us and even protect us. The question is: what do we do with those times?

Paul's Situation

Dan gave us a recap of where Paul was at this point in Acts 25. By now, Paul had completed many journeys visiting the scattered early church. He'd already been stoned, jailed, and shaved his head for a vow—but he'd also seen many miracles and many come to know Jesus. He'd written letters to the Galatians, Corinthians, and Romans. He was approximately 53 years old.

And he was under arrest. Again.

Felix, the previous Roman governor, had held him for two years hoping for a bribe. Now Festus was in charge. The Jewish leaders hadn't given up their petitions and desire to get rid of Paul—they'd been at it for two years and were now hassling the new governor for ten days straight, even plotting an assassination attempt.

Patience Isn't Passive

Dan picked out something important: Paul had to be patient. He simply couldn't do anything else. But he could choose how he was alone.

"Paul was stuck under arrest and couldn't do much, but he could have just sat and stewed in his own self pity. But he didn't. He spent his time listening to God, studying, and probably writing."

In his next prison situation, Paul wrote Philippians and Ephesians. He wasn't just sitting there doing nothing.

Dan then turned the mirror on us: "I know in the time that we live in, it's rare there's nothing to do or look at. I'm a dad, a husband, a business owner. There's always something to do, and always something to distract."

He used a word his father-in-law Roger loved: "furtling." What have you been doing? Oh, just been furtling—reading an article on social media, playing online Scrabble, just furtling.

There's nothing wrong with keeping our minds active, but Dan challenged us: "Sometimes we need time from distractions, time on our own, time where it's easier for God to speak to us, less distractions."

His practical suggestion? "Put some God space in your diary. I have it now in my diary, it actually says God space. Siri will pop up and say God space, just to encourage me to stop the busyness of life taking over."

Jesus said in Luke's Gospel: "By your patience possess your souls." Let's not be so busy we miss out.

Persistence for the Right Things

The Jewish leaders had a grudge and they weren't giving up. They'd already put pressure on the previous governor for two years and now hassled the new guy for ten days straight. Persistence is a good thing—if it's the right thing we're working for.

Dan shared a powerful example from his city: "I'm from Liverpool and I love this city. But in 1989 in Hillsborough, England, there was a horrific disaster of a football match where 96 Liverpool supporters died."

The people of Liverpool, especially the families and friends of those who died, fought for justice. There had been incorrect allegations made and cover-ups by the authorities. Liverpool supporters were put down in the press and by the establishment.

"But they persisted, and the truth was eventually told. This took a long time, and a favourable outcome has now come. They didn't give up."

We need to strive for what's right by keeping up, but by keeping our focus on him who is right, listening in the quiet times.

His Yoke Is Easy—But It's Still a Yoke

Dan pointed to Jesus's famous words: "Come to me all you who labour and are heavy laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I'm gentle and lowly in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

But Dan added an important nuance: "A little note from this is that we can give him our burdens, but we still need to take a yoke, a light burden. We don't walk around skipping with nothing to do, no work. We are to do his work, whatever that may be for us where we're at."

We're not carrying around the things that are too heavy for our backs—that's what we put on God's shoulders. But we're not called to do nothing. We're called to do his work.

"Some people can make it their life's work to take on the troubles of others, the worries, disguising it as empathy or compassion. We need to make sure we're just taking on what he's asked us to take on."

Wisdom and Trust Go Together

Paul had to give God his troubles and trust him, but also to listen to God. Dan believes God gave Paul wisdom on how to answer and when to answer. Paul brought the law to his advantage so the Jewish leaders couldn't get to him.

"In our lives we need to bring our concerns and our trials before God and ask for wisdom. To ask for him to move mountains when necessary, but we need to do what we can as well."

Dan got personal here. His son Luke has been having a lot of trouble at school with his education. They're praying a lot, asking God for wisdom, asking God to speak to them and to Luke.

"And he has, and he's bringing his peace, and he's brought his peace to him and to us, but we still have to push and strive in this world."

His wife Lisa has been studying, petitioning, getting things done, submitting formal complaints when work isn't done, getting their counsel on board. But in all of this, God has to remain their focus.

"If God is our focus and we put our trust in him, then we can look back at trials and problems and rest in the decisions that were made, knowing that he has the best for us."

Dan quoted Romans 8:28, which Paul wrote in a similar situation: "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose."

Paul knew his rights on earth. He knew he was a Roman citizen and that this meant he should be tried in Rome. This decision saved him—it stopped the trip to Jerusalem where the leaders plotted to kill him. But it also set off the chain of events that would cause him to be incarcerated for another two years.

"This is what I mean by knowing his word and resting in it. In those two years, do you think Paul thought, why didn't I stick to my guns, or why did I not just go to Jerusalem, it probably would have been alright? It probably wouldn't have."

Don't Let Your Grudge Become Your Life

The last thing Dan mentioned wasn't explicitly written in the text, but it's implied: forgiveness.

"I mentioned about fighting for the truth, for standing firm. In that we can come up against others that are against us, others that can and do hurt us. If we dwell on those things and deeds, they can occupy more than our noble goal. The fight can become a grudge and can eat away at us."

This is where sometimes the hardest step has to happen: we have to forgive those who have done wrong toward us.

Paul had plenty of people to forgive—those who stoned him, those who lied to put him away, those who hurt and killed others around him.

Dan shared his own struggle: "I've had people that have hurt my son with their actions. I have to forgive, and it's hard when it's not even against you, it's against someone you love."

He pointed to the Hillsborough example again: the people of Liverpool have seen justice for what was said about them in the press, but without forgiveness there can still just be hurt.

"These grudges and strivings can bring anger, they can limit our life, they can occupy time, they can come in the way of our destiny."

God can and does forgive. We need to take his example. We need to give our fights to God.

"Don't let your grudge be your life."

Bono's Extra Octave

Dan shared a remarkable story from Bono's autobiography (Surrender: 40 Songs, One Story, Bono.) Bono had an interesting and tricky relationship with his dad, Bob Hewson. Even after his father died, Bono realised he needed to forgive him—and to ask for his forgiveness.

In Bono's own words from Easter 2002: "I sat there and apologised to my father, Bob Hewson. I had forgiven him for his own crimes of passion but I'd never asked for his forgiveness for mine. I'll never know if it was related to me asking for this forgiveness in that little chapel, but after my father died something changed. I felt I got an extra couple of notes on my range. I felt I was becoming a real tenor as opposed to a pretend one. I could ring those high notes like a church bell as I had never hit them before."

Dan reflected: "I thought it was a really interesting example of what forgiveness can do for us in real life. Sometimes the burden we're holding on to is unforgiveness and it does literally hold us back."

His closing challenge: "Perhaps we need to come to him and cry out for his forgiveness. And get that extra octave in our lives."

Conversation Street

Matt hosted Conversation Street solo. The conversation focused heavily on forgiveness and church hurt.

How do you forgive friends who hurt you repeatedly?

Miriam asked in the comments about forgiving friends who do the same things over and over again. Matt acknowledged the difficulty—these are people in your tribe, people who should know better. He recommended checking out the talks on forgiveness from Sharon and Jenny Taylor in the Crowd archives, and suggested the book "Boundaries" by Dr. Henry Cloud. The key is continuing to forgive while also putting healthy boundaries in place.

What about hurt from church?

Keith and Peter shared that they'd had "mega problems" in their church in Spain, causing anger and pain—but they'd all forgiven and moved on, and they're stronger for it. Matt reflected that often the most hurt comes from our own tribe, our own community, the people we're supposed to trust. Church isn't perfect because it's made up of imperfect people. But walking away from church because of how some Christians behaved is like stopping supporting your football team because of how some supporters behaved.

How do you respond to problems in church?

Keith and Peter shared that because of the problems, they'd taken on the warden's job to try and bring change and bring everyone together. Matt loved this response—instead of leaving or complaining, they asked "How can I make a difference? How can I get involved?" He shared his own story of setting up "Hawks"—a boys' church programme—because his kids were bored at church. The response to problems can be to walk away, or it can be to get stuck in and help fix things.

Your Next Step

Here are some practical ways to engage with this:

1. Put God space in your diary – Dan literally has it in his calendar. Siri pops up and says "God space." What would help you stop and make room for God in your busy week?

2. Check your yoke – Are you carrying burdens God never asked you to carry? Are you taking on others' troubles disguised as empathy? Give the heavy stuff to God—and pick up only what he's asked you to pick up.

3. Ask for wisdom, then act – Bring your concerns to God and ask for wisdom. But also do what you can. Prayer and action go together.

4. Examine your grudges – Is there a fight that's become a grudge? Is unforgiveness eating away at you? Don't let your grudge become your life.

5. Consider forgiveness you need to ask for – Bono realised he needed to ask for his father's forgiveness, not just give it. Is there someone you need to approach?

The Extra Octave

Dan closed with a powerful image: Bono gained an extra couple of notes on his vocal range after forgiving his father. Something that had been held back was released.

What's being held back in your life because of unforgiveness? What "extra octave" might you gain if you let it go?

God in Jesus came and died that we may know freedom from sin and that we can be forgiven. All the things we have done that are worthy of death have been wiped away. We've been forgiven much. It's for us to know that eternal forgiveness and ask for God's grace to enable us to forgive others.

As Dan put it: "Perhaps we need to come to him and cry out for his forgiveness. And get that extra octave in our lives."