Finding Wholeness in God's Guidance

Finding Wholeness in God's Guidance

Who or what guides your decisions? It's a disarmingly simple question that cuts to the heart of what it means to be human – and what it means to pursue biblical wholeness.

In this week's instalment of our "Becoming Whole" series, Pete Farrington tackled the often-misunderstood concept of being led by the Spirit, challenging us to rethink what true freedom really looks like in a culture obsessed with independence and self-determination.

The Submission Question

Let's face it – "submission" isn't exactly a trendy concept these days. As Pete pointed out, "I've started talking about submission, but the thing is, we can't really talk seriously about being led without talking about submitting."

In a world that equates submission with inequality or oppression, the biblical understanding feels countercultural. Yet Pete challenged this assumption: "The idea that a difference in roles necessarily signals inequality is a totally unchristian idea."

Even within the Trinity – Father, Son, and Holy Spirit – we see perfect equality alongside different roles. Pete referenced Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane praying, "My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done" (Matthew 26:42). Here is submission within perfect relationship.

Who's Really Leading You?

"We all have to come to terms with the fact that we are all led by something," Pete explained. The real question isn't whether we're being led, but by what or whom.

Pete listed some of the things that often guide our decisions: independence, ambition, prestige, political ideology, public opinion, peer pressure, desire for comfort, or even simply trying to do good through our own efforts. None of these are neutral influences.

Our modern mantra of "follow your heart" sounds liberating, but Scripture offers a sobering assessment: "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick" (Jeremiah 17:9). The problem isn't just outside influences – it's that our own internal compass has been compromised.

The good news is that God offers a solution. In Ezekiel 36:27, He promises: "I will put my Spirit within you and cause you to walk in my statutes and be careful to obey my rules." This divine guidance system – the Holy Spirit living within believers – offers direction that transcends our limited, often misguided perspectives.

Walking by the Spirit

Turning to Galatians 5, Pete explored what being led by the Spirit looks like in practice. The apostle Paul addresses two opposite but equally dangerous extremes – legalism (thinking we can earn God's favor through religious rule-keeping) and license (thinking God's grace means we can live however we want).

The answer to both extremes is the same: "If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit" (Galatians 5:25).

Pete explained that our spiritual life begins entirely through the Spirit's work – "We have no ground for boasting at all. It was all Him." And if our spiritual life begins by the Spirit, it should continue the same way – through dependence on Him rather than self-reliance.

This dependence isn't just about avoiding "bad" things, but about actively producing what the Bible calls "the fruit of the Spirit" – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).

Pete offered a practical way to discern the Spirit's guidance: "When you are faced with a really difficult decision... use those two lists in Galatians 5 as a way of measuring what God's will is. Is that particular action or decision going to result in more self-control or sensuality? Is it going to produce more peace or more rivalry in your life?"

The Kite String Paradox

One of the most powerful images Pete shared was of flying a kite with his young son:

"The thing about a kite is that if that string is not taut, the kite just can't fly. It will just flop to the ground and end up in a puddle and getting torn in a tree or something. And it's actually the restriction of the kite that allows the kite to live out its purpose, to fly."

This paradox – that true freedom comes through submission – runs counter to our cultural intuitions. "A kite who's flopped to the puddle might be like, 'Yay, freedom!'" Pete observed. "But it's no longer actually able to live as a kite."

During Conversation Street, Matt and Will unpacked this paradox further, reflecting on what it means to truly trust God's guidance.

Trust: The Key to Being Led

"Trust is the big thing in any relationship," Peter noted in the comments – a sentiment that Will and Matt enthusiastically affirmed.

Will reflected: "It's very difficult to submit if we don't trust who we're submitting to. And to be honest, the only way really to build that trust is to try it." He shared a small but significant example from his own life – learning to pray about family holidays rather than relying solely on his own planning skills. This small step of trust led to experiences far better than what he could have orchestrated himself.

Matt shared about a difficult situation he'd faced that week, where his instinct was to react emotionally: "I had to go and separate myself and I walked around the park and I'm like, 'God, I need to know what you're saying here, because I need your guidance... I didn't want to be led by emotions. I didn't want to be led by my fear.'"

For both Matt and Will, trust grew through experience – seeing God's faithfulness in small decisions built confidence for bigger ones.

Will offered this reassurance to anyone struggling with making the "right" decision: "God will never judge us for making a decision with the level of understanding and faith that we had... That takes the pressure off. Like 'I've got to find the right way.' No. God gives us a measure of faith and understanding."

Matt added his perspective: "God can handle my failure much more than He can handle my disobedience." The point isn't perfect decision-making, but a willingness to follow God's leading as best we understand it.

The Adventure of Submission

Far from the dull, restrictive life that submission might suggest, following God's guidance leads to what Matt called "a life of adventure." This adventure isn't about constant excitement, but about growing trust through both mountaintop experiences and valley struggles.

"Don't let comfort talk you out of the adventures awaiting with God," Matt encouraged. Comfort can mimic wholeness, but it's ultimately fleeting and unsatisfying.

Will observed that in parts of the world where Christians face tremendous hardship, faith often thrives precisely because believers have learned to fully depend on God: "There's a real key there, because they really understand that exchange... There's real sincere joy and peace in a circumstance that most of us would go, 'I'd hate to live in that.'"

This perspective challenges our tendency to equate comfort with blessing. Perhaps the true blessing is learning to recognize God's voice and follow His leading, regardless of circumstances.

How Do I Know It's God?

A practical question arose during Conversation Street: How do we know when we're hearing God versus our own thoughts?

Will shared that while dramatic "skywriting" guidance is rare, he's found that "a sense of peace about a decision you make when you've prayed, when you've submitted to God... is absolutely a real key guide for me."

Matt referenced the story of Paul in Acts, where the apostle started down one path, but "the Holy Spirit constrained him." That sense of unease was God's guidance. "Even Paul, that surely he prayed about going on. And he thought he was going the right way... he could trust God and God got through to him by this sort of sense of uneasiness."

This gentle leading – sometimes through peace, sometimes through unease – is available to all believers who seek to follow God's guidance.

Your Next Step

As we continue this "Becoming Whole" series, consider these questions:

1. What or who is currently guiding your decisions? Is it comfort, fear, ambition, or the Holy Spirit?

2. Is there an area where you sense God leading you, but you've been hesitant to follow?

3. How might your life change if you viewed submission to God not as restriction, but as the path to true freedom?